A child’s first day at a nursery is not an easy experience, not just for the child, but for the parents too. Worried about their child’s reaction to this new experience, parents often stress out, a sentiment that doesn’t elude the children.
Nursery plays a vital role in shaping a child’s life. This is the place where the seeds of his future are sown.
Both the parents and their children can make better use of this productive experience with proper selection of the nursery and knowledge of how to prepare children for their first adventure away from their parents.
Choosing the right nursery is the first step parents should work hard on, explained Dr Heba Kotb, a psychology professor at the American University in Cairo.
First, the nursery has to be inspected for its safety and cleanliness, she added. Look around the kitchen, the toilets, the windows/balconies and the toys made available for the children.
The second thing to look for is the ratio of adults to children. The younger the child the more adults will be needed. It is also important to look at the qualifications of the teachers.
Parents need to ask about how the nursery manages misbehavior. Parents should also choose a nursery that has conduct rules that match with those at home, so that the child doesn’t feel confused, explained Kotb.
Once the decision is made, the parents should introduce the idea gradually to their child, acquainting the child with the nursery’s activities. Finding a nice book that illustrates a day in the nursery is a great way to introduce your child to what he or she will be doing.
Kotb advises taking the children for a tour at the nursery before the first day, and introduce them to the teacher, letting them get acquainted with the class, which could ease the transition into unfamiliar territory.
Dropping off the child at the nursery is critical in his/her perception of the experience. Children can pick up on their parents’ nonverbal cues. If the parent feels guilty or worried about leaving his or her child at school, the child will probably sense that.
“After so many years of seeing children walking into a nursery for the first time, parents play a major role when they express confidence and enthusiasm about the new decision they have taken, said Lobna Abdel Al, a nursery teacher. “Speak positively to your child about your expectations, and she or he will most likely work hard to meet them.
On the first day, if the child hadn’t met the teacher before, parents are advised to introduce the two and then step back to let the child set the tone. The teacher should have the space to start forming a relationship with the child.
If the child still clings to the parents, they shouldn’t fret. Instead, they should leave the child to move according to his or her own pace. However, they should also try to find a way to leave.
According to Abdel Al, the best way to leave is to say a brief goodbye and tell them you will be picking them up after a certain time, for example after snack time. Parents should stick to what they tell their children so as not to lose their trust. Leaving without saying goodbye may make the child feel deserted, whereas a long farewell scene might only strengthen a child’s sense that nursery is a bad place.
If the nursery allows it, a transitional object like a family picture, a special doll, or a favorite blanket, can also help comfort your child.
Even if they start crying the minute their parents leave, they shouldn’t be hesitant or show feelings of guilt; most children settle down a little while after their parents leave.
“It is important to know that the time to settle and feel comfortable about being in a nursery differs from one child to another.
However, your child might spend some time fluctuating between happiness and sadness until he feels assured and settles down, said Kotb.
What parents do after picking up the child from the nursery is also important. They should be excited to listen to what the child has done during the day, complement his/her “accomplishments and encourage him/her.
They should never criticize the teacher in front of the child, because children need to trust the person they are spending their whole day with.
